#5 – Why is it so hard?

My daughter asked me a few months ago…  “Mom, if it is God’s will for us to do this, why is it so hard?”

In each of my blogs I’ve continued to mention our dream of helping more children who stand alone in the foster care system by creating a healing place on a farm.  A place that they can call home, a place where they know they belong to a forever family.

Finding families to adopt children who have been in “temporary” foster care too long or who are at-risk of being there too long is our call.  It is not an easy call… not many people are willing to open their hearts to four siblings between 5 and 13 who have already been in foster care for five years.  Or even to a toddler whose birth mother likely drank plenty alcohol during the pregnancy.  It is a call that requires hard work, long hours and an unwavering faith.

Finding land and resources to create a healing place for children is not easy either.  But this place will provide loving homes for some of the children who we have yet to find families for as well as help prepare them for adoption.  The nature of foster care is meant to be temporary and should not last more than 18 to 24 months.  Our federal guidelines indicate that each child should only have two foster homes throughout the length of stay.

So when we meet children who have been there already five years or a seventeen year olds who has been in foster care all her life and reports moving through 27 foster homes before finally getting adopted we know that there is still much work to do.  The work is hard work, work that requires faith in God!  Mark 11:22

I like what D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones, former pastor of London’s Westminster Chapel said:

“Faith is holding on to the faithfulness of God and, as long as you do that, you cannot go wrong….”

My thoughts: ‘When life is hard and troubles surround us, the world, even some friends and family might think we’re going wrong to do what we do, so we hold on to God…’

Lloyd-Jones’ statement:  “Faith does not look at the difficulties…”

My thoughts: ‘Difficulties like; broken promises, four months without state contract payments, a foster care system that doesn’t always accept available adoptive families for the foster children in need, houses that don’t sell, rain that never seems to stop on this mountain….’

Lloyd-Jones’ statement:  “Faith does not look at itself or at the person who is exercising it.  Faith looks at God….”

My thoughts:  ‘It is not through my efforts or work that God’s will is accomplished.  If it is His will, it will get done.  Then why am I so stressed about my “to do” list? Won’t God get it done when He wants it to get done?’

Lloyd-Jones’ statement: “Faith is interested in God only, and it talks about God and it praises God and it extols the virtues of God.  The measure of the strength of a man’s faith, always, is ultimately the measure of his knowledge of God…  He knows God so well that he can rest on the knowledge.  And it is the prayers of such a man that are answered.”

My thoughts: ‘Lord, help me talk about YOU and praise YOU rather than complain about how hard things are in this life you have created us to live!  You are so good to provide for our family here on the Big Island even though our house on Oahu did not sell.  Thank you that it is finally rented out.  You are such an awesome God to keep HOPE INC, Inc. functioning even though we went four months without state contract payments. Praise you for the donations that came in and that nobody missed a pay check.  Thank you for the wonderful help we’ve had from volunteers.  And last to mention but not least; Thank you that you continue to support our efforts here on the Big Island by creating a team of local long time residents who have the same vision to build a healing place for children who continue to stand alone in the foster care system.  I call them my AAA group which stands for Abundantly Above All.’

My answer to my daughter’s question, “Why is it so hard?”; I don’t know why, but I do know that if we look beyond the hard we will see God’s Abundantly Above All answers.

Now to him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us. Ephesians 3:20

I just got an e mail from a HOPE INC, Inc. adoptive family who while raising six birth sons listened to the Lord when He asked them to adopt two foster children.  I remember that the placement was difficult with much adjustment in the home and legal challenges surrounded the legalization. But they saw God do abundantly above all in time for them to move from Hawaii to California to a new job.  Here is their news…

We were told in California that a family our size is not allowed to adopt. But regardless, we are working on another adoption, and were wondering if you could send a copy of the home study you did for us a few years ago? Thanks for the training and support you gave us during the adoption of Peter and Elizabeth - I’m sure that is what prepared us to take on another adoption.

Four weeks ago, a couple in our church who run a ministry to homeless and addicted people told us that there was a woman in the local hospital with a newborn baby that needed adopting. She already had three children and has struggled with addiction. We went to the hospital to meet the birth mom, and she decided she wanted us to adopt her baby. A day later, we took Katie Grace home!

The birth mom had tried to find someone to adopt the baby earlier, but a few couples had backed out because of the drug exposure. The birth mom had already picked out the name Katie, which is the girl’s name we had wanted to use for the last 16 years, but we had all boys.

Whatever path God has chosen for each of us to walk we will know “hard” but if we know God we’ll also know his abundance as we keep our eyes on HIM.

Category: Blog of HOPE